New Clubs

After some time with my old...OLD clubs, I started havng some problems, well I should say I continued having problems now they were different. Besides my obvious swing hitches, or I should say lack of anything resembling a real golf swing, the equiment that was already broken down really started breaking down. The clubs literally began to break when I made contact. Maybe this was due to the increase in said contact or maybe after a thousand years buried and then unearthed by a golf archeaologist and played by a 12/13 year old they finally tapped out. I was teeing off on the first at Hillview my "home" course and I noticed what appeared to be shrapnel leaving the wooden driver upon collision. I looked down at the club and noticed that what used to be the flat face of my club now resembled a topographical map of the himalayas. There were jagged edges and splinters everywhere and the little metal striker plate that used to be there had apparently been sacrificed to the golf gods, because it was nowhere to be found. So I figured this would be the last day with these clubs. Later that week I noticed an ad in the paper for "Golf Sale" at building 19 1/2. I thought to myself, man what does this store not have. You can go in buy a quart of oil, a carpet runner, a can of cashews, a 3 pack of underwear and a combo back scratcher/massage tool. Now they have golf clubs, this is awesome! I asked my dad if we could go look and he agreed to take me and my borhters down to look. It was like nothing I had ever seen I could grab irons one at a time from the giant racks and make a whole set. I, of course, knew next to nothing about golf clubs and just started grabbing every number and letter I could find. It is wierd I thought that ther can be numbers like 3,4,and 5 and then some random numbers lik 56 and 60. Then I saw all sorts of letters, P, which I did know was a pitching wedge, then there was an S, an L, a G, and an A. I had not even gotten to the woods yet. My father being a complete novice in the sport as well told me he knew a little about which clubs you needed. He said I should have numbers 3 through 9 and definitely a P wedge. He also said I needed a 1 and 3 wood. I then promptly grabbed one of each of these clubs. I didnt get the brand names. No, I got the ones with the cool names and pictures on them. OOOOOO "Power Driver" that sounds good, "Super Spin Wedge" also very nice, and I then saw ones that read "tour edition" I figured hey if its good enough for the late great Payne Stewart, they are good enough for me. Of course I was wrong on so many levels. For a long time I wondered why some of my irons were so hard to hit and always felt funny. It turns out that those were called tour edition because they were blade irons, which should only be used by people who are pretty much scratch golfers. Thank god I only bought 2 irons with that label. They were the 3 iron and 5 iron. Lets just say I didn't use those much! After finding an assortment of different clubs all with great names like "powershot" and some that had ferocious looking animals on them we went to find bags for each of us. Well we all bought the exact same army green carry bags that when empty probably weighed the same as a dump truck full of lead. Man you could see our foursome coming from a mile away...well I guess really you couldn't because our bags blended in to the course, making us look like the Army rangers of the golf world. Needless to say these clubs were a serious step up from the old guys but they were a long way away from great. The funny thing is, I am still drawn to the cool names. I buy nike "MOJO" balls, and I own a hybrid club with the moniker "Wizard". I guess you can take the club scrounging kid out of Building 19 but you cant take the I want cool names on my clubs out of the kid.